New Year's Resolutions

I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas and hope you have a safe and happy New Year!  One of MY new year's resolutions is to get back to crafting soon, but the only one I think I can keep! However, I asked my kitties what resolutions they would make for 2011 and here's what they had to say!

• I will not puff my entire body to twice its size for no reason after my human has finished watching a scary movie.

• I will not help myself to Q-tips, and I must certainly not proceed to stuff them down the sink's drain.

• I will not lean way over to drink out of the tub, fall in, and then pelt into the box of clumping cat litter.

• I will not use the bathtub to store live mice for late-night snacks.

• I will not play Herd of Thundering Wildebeests Stampeding Across the Plains of the Serengeti over my humans' bed while she’s trying to sleep.

• I will not try to leap through closed windows to catch birds outside. If I forget this and bonk my head on the window and fall behind the couch in my attempt, I will not get up and do the same thing again.

• I will not stick my paw into any container to see if there is something in it. If I do, I will not hiss and scratch when my human has to shave me to get the rubber cement out of my fur.

• I will not check every door when it rains because I will believe my human that it will be raining on all sides of the house.

• Birds do not come from the bird feeder. I will not knock it down and try to open it up to get the birds out.

• I will not play "dead cat on the stairs" when my human is trying to bring in groceries or laundry, or else one of these days, it will really come true.

• I will not swat my human's head repeatedly when she's on the family room floor trying to do sit ups.

• When my human puts me into the Cage Of Death for a trip to the vet, I will not try to use my own urine as a corrosive agent as it will not eat through the cage walls.

• Dry cat food is both tasty and nutritious, and it is always available. I will not starve myself and act pitiful all day long in anticipation of the canned food.

• I will not walk on the keyboard when my human is writing important emiognaioerp ga3qi4 taija3tgv aa35 a.

• I will not eat spider plants and then hallucinate behind the toilet.

• I will not soak my catnip toys in the toilet to make tea.


Cheers to you all and give your kitties a little milk on New Year's eve!  See you in 2011!

13 comments:

  1. oh you are soooo funny...I loved reading the kittehs new years resolutions...they crack me up..hey did you still want to do a swap for more of your sweet wool fabric?

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  2. I love this post!! Very funny!! Thanks for sharing your kitties resolutions.

    Brenda

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  3. Oh, how funny! My cat needs to make this
    resolution...I will not run out the front door and make my Mommy chase me all over the neighborhood! Which I just did! Happy New Year to you, too!

    Bear Hugs & Blessings~Karen

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  4. Oh I'm going to be laughing all nite at this ! How true! Loved it!

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  5. Cute post!! My daughter had to move back home this past year and she has two cats...so her and I can relative to your kitties New Year resolutions.
    ~Cindy~

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  6. Read this to hubby and we are both laughing our buts off.Tooo true for any cat owner.Warm Blessings!~Amy

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  7. Oh my gosh those kitty resolutions are too funny and too real!!!
    Happy New Year!
    Karen

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  8. I am laughing hard!! I have always had cats that act just like yours!! It most be A Cat Thing!!! Thanks for the laugh!! Hope the Kitties can stick to that list ... Happy New Year!

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  9. That was sooooo funny!!!! Can I add:
    I will not open my catnip bag on mommy's pillow!
    I will get along with other cats in house!
    Live mice are not good gifts to give mommy!
    and.....I will not walk on the car and leave muddy paw prints.
    Shirley

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  10. OK, I have no kitties because I am highly allergic to them, but this made me laugh out loud! You are one highly creative kitty master. :) Thanks for the smile!

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  11. Hahaha that is a funny post and set me up for the New Year already.
    May you and your kittie's keep all your resolutions (it be probably easier for you then them)

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  12. ROFL!!!! Oh my gosh, Laurie, Fantastic post! My husband and I were just sitting here in the living room laughing like crazy. Very funny, and very, very true. We have four cats and can definitely relate to more then a few of those resolutions. ;-)
    I hope you're doing well and that you will have a wonderful New Year.

    Blessings,
    Susan

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  13. Hahahaha! My fur babies are guilty of several of those. That's cute:) I'm not making a bunch of resolutions either. I'm already craving chocolate:)
    Carol

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